A lot of people, when talking about overcoming difficult times, talk about acceptance. Accept what happened. Accept what changed. Accept the person you are now.
I’m here to tell you that you don’t always have to accept everything.
I talk a lot about my body and how I rebuilt my life after losing the ability to move about 85% of my spine. People might assume that I’ve accepted that fate.
I haven’t.
Honestly, it’s fucking bullshit. It sucks. What the hell did I do to deserve it? Nothing.
But that’s how life goes sometimes. Good people get screwed, bad people win, and there isn’t always a satisfying reason for any of it. Is it fair? No. Am I going to let that stop me from living the best life possible? Absolutely not.
I don’t accept my body, and I probably never will. I hate feeling trapped inside it. Some days it really bothers me. Other days, I barely think about it.
But even on the days when it does bother me, I’m not going to let it stop me from doing what I love or creating the best life possible for myself. I’m not going to sit around feeling sorry for myself. I’m going to build the life I deserve, even if I can’t get a body like Nebula or Genos.
If you know who both of them are, you’ve earned some brownie points.
The point is that acceptance is not always a required stop on the road to success. Sometimes acceptance can free you. Other times, the goal isn’t acceptance. The goal is learning how to live fully alongside something you still hate.
Coming to terms with something and accepting it are not the same thing.
I understand what happened to me. I recognize what I can’t change. I know the reality of the body I live in. But that doesn’t mean I have to like it, approve of it, or pretend that I’m at peace with every part of it.
I can hate what happened to my body without hating my life.
I can be angry about what I lost and still fight for everything I want.
I may never accept my body.
And that’s okay.